If you are new to the blog, welcome! If you have been around for the late-night posts, thanks for still reading, and I think you’ll enjoy this series. As I continue pursuing my Master’s degree, we are tasked with creating a series of blog posts throughout the semester. I am someone who continually relays the idea of “writing down how you are feeling” and “bottling things up is detrimental to your health.” Still, I always find it borderline funny (the crying inside kind of funny) at the end of the week when all I have done is hold everything in. So, I have decided to dedicate these eight weeks to writing more down and talking about what I am learning and how we can hopefully all grow together. I will be pulling inspiration from my work experiences, readings that I do for my course, and personal experiences as well. I hope you enjoy the first part of the series and feel free to subscribe via email! (:
Bob Ross. Fred Rogers. Nick Mercs. Kobe Bryant. Casey Diffley. What do these names all have in common? Well… probably not much for most of you, but for me, there is a lot.
Anxiety can be a rugged mountain to climb. It also seems like everyone has a different way of handling it, which can even add to the mountain because you begin to think maybe their way of handling anxiety is the way you should be handling yours. Something I have recently been trying to remind myself is that anxiety should not only be handled differently by everyone but probably will be handled differently by someone every day. Just because I need to watch a Bob Ross episode today to calm down doesn’t mean I won’t need to watch Nick Mercs play Warzone and yell at stream snipers to accomplish the same feat the next day.
This past week, I have begun to process what will be required of me in my 8-week class. From financial statements to understanding on a deeper level how Chart of Accounts work, the course is not going to be my cup of tea. So, what began to happen… overthinking, loss of sleep, procrastination… all the poor habits that affect your mental health. All of this, accompanied by trying to teach a Leadership course for college students and supervise a residence hall of 250+ first-year students during a pandemic. Thankfully, I leaned on the advice that I have received continuously from the names above.
“Some days, doing ‘the best we can’ may still fall short of what we would like to be able to do, but life isn’t perfect on any front-and doing what we can with what we have is the most we should expect of ourselves or anyone else.” – Mr. Rogers
“If you’re afraid to fail, then you’re probably going to fail.” -Kobe
“Colin… Relax” -Casey Diffley
So, what did I do? I kept stressing and didn’t listen to any of that advice. Until I finally reached out to my professor for help, which ended up being the best conversation I have had since starting the program over a year ago. I have now set a plan within the program to gain knowledge and experience that will benefit what I hope to accomplish long term.
Being a leader induces anxiety. Being a human provokes anxiety. And that is ok. What’s not ok, is to bury it within yourself. Bottling feelings and emotions is similar to having a bow and arrow inside of you. Whenever you hold something in and do not address it, you pull that bow back a little further. For a while, maybe you can hold the pressure; but eventually, you will have to let go. Letting go releases the arrow, and it’s only going to hurt… you. So, throughout this 8-week series, I hope to speak a lot about leadership and what it means to be a success. What I hope everyone hears when they read my writings, however, is that you are already a success. You just have to give yourself a second in time to acknowledge it.
Bob Ross. Fred Rogers. Nick Mercs. Kobe Bryant. Casey Diffley. These are all people who have made a difference in my life at times without even knowing they did a thing. So, in times of stress, in times of anxiety, give yourself a little credit. You may not be winning in your mind, but you might be helping someone else win in theirs.
Thanks for reading along, and feel free to comment on how you are giving yourself credit this week and ways you avoid pulling the bow back; I’d love to hear!
-Colin Lane Croat